Internet dating maxim

Once you're sitting in front of her with the less-than- 15-percent hair loss that she's handicapped your photo for, then you can really get to know each other—as two hormone-leaking, masochistic adults who want so badly to be in love again._—Mary H. Choi _You want to say you're an oenophile or fluent in Klingon? The beauty of online dating is that it's stocked with people on the ends of the bell curve—the kind you'd never find normally.So let your freak/geek/pedantic-wine-lover flag fly."My life is CRAZY.Otherwise, it's hard to take a self-portrait, especially in the mirror, without looking like a vain asshole."Davidson: "People need to see your face, but shooting up close with a wide-angle lens makes your nose look bigger.Have whoever's shooting step back just enough to get a three-fourths shot of your body."Urbinati: "White can wash out in photos, so if you're in shape, a simple well-fitting crew tee or Henley in gray is flattering and effortless.(Okay, maybe I will.) I'd like to tell you I hang glide and build soup kitchens in Haiti, but last Saturday I got drunk at home and watched an entire season of_ Gossip Girl_.I guess that's me 'living in the moment.' God, I'm such a dork.""Why do we connect?

Or you could follow our flowchart and find the one designed to pair you with the woman (or man, or costume-wearing sex slave) of your dreams.2. But three weeks (and six dates) from now, you'll realize that online dating is, for better and worse, just like regular dating—and not, sadly, like ordering a pizza online.3.Don't Be That Guy Says he's looking for: "A girl who's into sports and being fit."Is actually looking for: C cups or bigger.Says he can't live without: "Cookies 'n Cream Promax bars, endorphins, music where the bass drops.Mention a few TV shows, movies, bands, and books you enjoy, but take it easy on the esoteric poetry, eight-year-old Bay Area rap lyrics, and the word I.See, your profile isn't meant to make a stranger fall in love with you.

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